Milk

For those that have been reading my blog for long know that I loved breastfeeding Emma.  I experienced major emotional issues when my supply dropped about two months into going back to work.  The day that my husband had to give her a formula bottle, I bawled.  I really felt like I was letting Emma down.  I was sad and confused as to why my body could not produce enough milk for her.  December 3rd, 2012 was our last nursing session.  I remember it like it was yesterday- although I have never blogged about that last day.  I was two months pregnant with Everly.  I sat in Emma's nursery and cried silent tears since I knew our nursing relationship was over.

Luckily, I already knew I was pregnant and knew that I would get to have this journey again.  It helped to ease the silent pain that comes with the end of a nursing relationship.  I knew I would try to do things differently this time around.  With Emma, I underestimated how much stored milk I would need when the time came and my supply dropped.  I thought I had so much breast milk stored up, but when Emma was drinking more than I was producing on a daily basis, I knew that the frozen milk would eventually run out.  This time around, I am more determined than ever to make it to a year of breastfeeding Everly.  To help with this- I knew I would need to start pumping immediately.

I will eventually get to Everly's birth story, but to cut to the chase, I lost a ton of blood after giving birth- it took the nurses close to 40 minutes to get the bleeding to stop.  As soon as I was taken care of, I was allowed to breastfeed Everly.  She latched on beautifully.  It was the start of this miraculous journey again.  I teared up just watching her nurse.  I love the personal photos that Wes captured of this moment.

When we got home, I started pumping (mostly to alleviate engorgement) immediately.  Everly is 10 days old today and I have 70 ounces already pumped.  I know that this journey will have lots of ups and downs along the way, but I am ready to embrace it :).  I feel so blessed that I get to experience breastfeeding all over again.